100+最佳斯托纳笑话：大麻喜剧收藏

欢迎来到斯托纳笑话、杂草双关语和大麻幽默的终极收藏！ 无论您是想在烟雾中打破僵局，还是只是想开怀大笑，我们都为您提供了 100 多个庆祝大麻文化轻松一面的笑话。

快速回答

寻找最好的斯通纳笑话？ 你来对地方了！ 从像“我告诉我的植物一个笑话......他们现在都是崭露头角的喜剧演员”这样的经典单线人到诙谐的双关语和观察性的幽默，这个系列适合每个大麻爱好者。 继续滚动按类别组织的 100 多个笑话。

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经典石头一线

这些快速点击非常适合任何场合：

1. 为什么斯托纳种植 Cheerios？ He thought they were donut seeds.

2. 你怎么称呼石头人把他的杂草洒在地板上？ Drug abuse.

3. 你怎么知道你是一个真正的石头人？ When your friends make you a birthday cake shaped like a bong.

4. 石匠和政治家有什么区别？ A politician doesn't inhale.

5. 为什么石头人盯着橙汁盒？ It said "concentrate."

6. 有两个分裂的石头人叫什么？ Double-jointed.

7. 鱼怎么变高了？ Seaweed.

8. 为什么石匠从来没有感冒过？ They're always surrounded by their buds.

9. 石匠对他的朋友说了什么？ "I'm so high, I can hear colors."

10. 石匠为什么过马路？ ...What was the question again?

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会让你呻吟的杂草双关语

这些双关语太糟糕了，它们很好：

11. 斯托纳最喜欢的音乐类型是什么？ Ragtime... wait, no... reggae!

12. 我想给你讲个杂草笑话... but I'll let it grow on you.

13. 为什么大麻植物是这么好的朋友？ Because it was always there to help you mellow out.

14. 你怎么称呼在聚会上很高的人？ The life of the potty.

15. 我试着想出一个锅玩笑... but my ideas went up in smoke.

16. 为什么斯托纳斯是这么好的朋友？ They're always down to earth.

17. 懒惰的石头人叫什么？ A baked potato.

18. 为什么石匠变成了面包师？ He wanted to get baked legally.

19. 石匠最喜欢的运动是什么？ Rolling.

20. 我的植物告诉我一个秘密... It was bud-lieve-able.

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420 Jokes

庆祝大麻文化中最具标志性的数字：

21. 为什么 420 对石头人来说就像圣诞节一样？ Everyone gathers around a tree.

22. 在斯托纳的世界里总是几点钟？ 4:20 somewhere!

23. 我在4:20检查了我的手表... and forgot what I was doing.

24. 为什么石匠喜欢数字时钟？ They get to see 4:20 twice a day.

25. 石匠一年中最喜欢的日期是什么？ April 20th - it's like Christmas and New Year combined!

26. 石匠怎么算？ 1, 2, 3... wait, what comes after... oh yeah, 420!

27. 为什么斯通纳人会为 4:20 设置闹钟？ To remind them it's time to... wait, what was I saying?

28. 石匠的官方时区是什么？ 4:20 Standard Time.

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斯通纳逻辑笑话

因为有时斯通纳逻辑是最好的逻辑：

29. 斯通纳认为： "If I eat my edible on an empty stomach, is my stomach really empty?"

30. 第420章 哲学 "What if plants are really farming us, giving us oxygen until we die and decompose so they can consume us?"

31. 深思： "Maybe we're just pets for cats, and they're too polite to tell us."

32. 斯托纳智慧： "I finally understand why it's called a blunt - because afterward, I'm blunt about everything."

33. 深夜实现： "What if 'OK' is just a sideways stickman?"

34. 心动了： "The word 'bed' looks like a bed."

35. 高思路： "Do crabs think fish can fly?"

36. 斯托纳哲学： "If you clean a vacuum, you become a vacuum cleaner."

37. 生存危机： "Why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways?"

38. 深层问题： "If oranges are orange, why aren't lemons called yellows?"

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吃货的笑话

因为零食是真实的：

39. 石匠为什么去塔可钟？ To think outside the bun... and inside the stomach.

40. 石匠最喜欢的披萨配料是什么？ All of them. Every single one.

41. 你怎么知道斯托纳煮熟的晚餐？ There's Doritos in the salad.

42. 为什么石匠在他的冰淇淋上放了泡菜？ Don't knock it 'til you try it, man.

43. 斯托纳最喜欢谷物的东西是什么？ It's breakfast that's socially acceptable at 2 AM.

44. 石匠需要多少零食？ Yes.

45. 为什么石匠喜欢披萨送货？ It comes with its own circle of life.

46. What did the stoner say at the buffet? "Challenge accepted."

47. Why did the stoner refrigerator break? It was open too many times between 10 PM and 4 AM.

48. What's a stoner's emergency number? Domino's.

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Relationship Jokes

Love is in the air... and so is something else:

49. How does a stoner propose? "Will you be my pot-ner for life?"

50. What's a stoner's love language? Passing to the left.

51. Why are stoner couples so happy? They always share.

52. What did the stoner say on his wedding day? "I do... also, do we have snacks?"

53. How do stoners break up? "It's not you, it's my tolerance."

54. What's a stoner's idea of a romantic date? Netflix and grill... er, chill.

55. Why did the stoner get married at 4:20? It was high time!

56. What's the key to a happy stoner marriage? Joint accounts.

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Work & Career Jokes

Even stoners gotta make a living:

57. Why was the stoner such a good gardener? Green thumb came naturally.

58. What's a stoner's dream job? Professional taste tester at a snack factory.

59. Why did the stoner become a chef? He was already an expert at rolling.

60. How does a stoner answer the phone at work? "Yellow?"

61. Why was the stoner promoted? He was always thinking higher.

62. What's a stoner's favorite spreadsheet? The one that calculates how many grams are in an ounce.

63. Why do stoners make good philosophers? They're always contemplating life's big questions.

64. What do you call a stoner accountant? Someone who can count to 420.

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Movie & Pop Culture Jokes

Lights, camera, munchies:

65. Why do stoners love The Wizard of Oz? Something about that yellow brick road...

66. What's a stoner's favorite superhero? The Green Lantern - for obvious reasons.

67. Why do stoners love Finding Nemo? They relate to the forgetfulness.

68. What's a stoner's favorite Star Wars character? Chewbacca - great name for a wake 'n bake.

69. Why do stoners love Disney movies? The colors, man... the colors.

70. What's a stoner's favorite Lord of the Rings quote? "Pipe-weed!"

71. Why do stoners appreciate Inception? "A dream within a dream? Whoaaaa."

72. What's a stoner's favorite game show? "Wheel of... wait, what show is this?"

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Question & Answer Jokes

Classic setup-punchline format:

73. Q: What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

A: You can tune a piano but you can't... wait, what was the question?

74. Q: How many stoners does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Dude, it's pretty chill in the dark though.

75. Q: What do you get when you eat too many edibles?

A: A trip to the moon without leaving your couch.

76. Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

A: Because it was feeling crumby... also it might have been an edible.

77. Q: What do clouds and stoners have in common?

A: They're both high and sometimes look at you funny.

78. Q: What's a stoner's favorite subject in school?

A: History - because they keep repeating themselves.

79. Q: What did the big bud say to the little bud?

A: "You've got a lot of growing up to do."

80. Q: How do you hide money from a stoner?

A: Put it in their shoes - they never look down there.

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Observational Humor

Things stoners notice:

81. Ever notice how time moves slower when you're high, but your pizza disappears faster?

82. Isn't it weird that we call it "hitting" a bong when we're being super gentle with it?

83. You know what's funny? Looking for your lighter when it's in your hand.

84. Random thought: If you roll a bad joint, is it still a joint effort?

85. Observation: A watched pot never boils, but a watched stoner definitely gets paranoid.

86. Funny how every great idea seems amazing at 2 AM and terrible at 2 PM.

87. Strange but true: Stoners can spend an hour deciding what to watch and five minutes watching it.

88. Curious fact: The munchies have zero respect for your diet.

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Animal Kingdom Jokes

Nature is lit:

89. What do you call a high bee? A buzzed bee.

90. Why do stoners love sloths? Spirit animals, man.

91. What's a stoner's favorite bird? The high-nest... er, highest?

92. Why do stoners relate to cats? Both can stare at nothing for hours.

93. What do you call a high snake? A baked noodle.

94. Why are stoners and squirrels alike? They both bury things and forget where.

95. What's a stoner's favorite fish? Puff puff bass.

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Bonus Jokes: The Extras

Because we promised 100+:

96. I got so high once... I tried to use my car key fob to unlock my front door. Then I wondered why the door beeped.

97. You know you're high when... you try to pause the microwave because you need to "process."

98. Stoner hack that failed: Putting chips in the fridge because "cold chips must be like cold pizza."

99. True story: Spent 20 minutes looking for my phone... while using the flashlight on my phone.

100. The ultimate stoner move: Heating up leftover pizza in the oven but forgetting you put it there until the smoke alarm reminds you.

101. Why did the stoner bring a ladder to the bar? Because they heard the drinks were on the house.

102. What do you call a group of stoners at a classical concert? High society.

103. Why are stoners like turtles? They're both chill and carry their house wherever they go.

104. What did the stoner name his triplet sons? Bud, Buddy, and Budster.

105. Why did the stoner think he was a good cook? Everything he made was fire.

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How to Use These Jokes

At a smoke session: Drop a one-liner when there's a lull in conversation.

Breaking the ice: Stoner jokes are a great way to connect with fellow enthusiasts.

Social media: These make great captions and tweets.

Just for yourself: Sometimes you need to laugh at yourself, and that's perfectly fine.

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Why Cannabis Comedy Matters

Humor has always been a part of cannabis culture. From Cheech and Chong in the 1970s to modern-day comedians, laughter and cannabis go hand in hand. These jokes celebrate the community, the shared experiences, and the joy that comes from not taking yourself too seriously.

Whether you're a casual consumer or a dedicated enthusiast, these jokes remind us that at the end of the day, cannabis culture is about community, relaxation, and yes - plenty of laughs.

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Share Your Favorites

Got a joke that didn't make the list? The best stoner jokes often come from the community itself. Share them at your next session and keep the tradition of cannabis comedy alive!

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This guide is for entertainment purposes. Cannabis laws vary by jurisdiction.